I think back fondly sometimes to the days when the only person I had to think about was me.
Read a book all day long in my pajamas while eating popcorn and chocolate? Sure.
Take an impromptu trip to DC to see the museums? Great idea!
Enjoy a nice pedicure at a salon with a girlfriend on a Saturday afternoon? Perfect.
See more than one movie in the theater in one weekend? Absolutely.
As mothers I believe we all can reflect on the “good ole days” even if we love our kids to pieces. Those moms that say they can’t remember how life was pre-kids are the same ones that claim, “After five years I can’t remember how painful labor was,” — and I don’t believe any of them.
This doesn’t mean we don’t love our kids less, it doesn’t.
It does mean that sometimes being a parent is overwhelming. And that’s normal.
Moms often bear the burden of creating, implementing and maintaining the family schedule. I, myself, have three different calendars to keep myself on track: The family calendar in the kitchen, my work calendar, and my blogging calendar. Sometimes the three fit nicely together, and other times it’s like trying to fit a square peg in a round hole.
But somehow it always works out.
Except when you forget that Friday was picture day at the elementary school, despite being written on two different calendars, and yours is the only child that doesn’t have the picture form and money. And because of this your child is the only one in her class that isn’t allowed to get her photo taken. I’m not saying this just happened last Friday to me, I’m simply “supposing”….
Which brings me to the one thing every mother wants for Mother’s Day, and one of my most favorite movie quotes of all time.
I don’t want to plan my Mother’s Day. I don’t even want to tell you what it is that I want, because really? I’m not sure I even want anything. I don’t want to plan. I don’t want presents. I might want to cook dinner because I like to, but the dishes? I don’t want to do them. Also? I don’t want to get up with the kids in the morning, but I also don’t want to lay in bed until Noon. I might want to get up early and leave the house, or I might not – but if I’m not the only one up early with the kids, I’ll have the choice…at the last minute, if I choose.
So that quote I mentioned?
If I start with, remember that movie with Jennifer Aniston and Vince Vaughn, you know… “The Breakup”? Inevitably if there’s a mom around, she’ll say, “YES. The DISHES!”
Because this one sentence sums it up for moms everywhere, both for Mother’s Day, and for everyday really.
Here it is:
“I don’t want you to do the dishes, I want you to WANT to do the dishes.”
So as you sit thinking about what to get your wife, mom or whomever for Mother’s Day, just know that the words “It’s taken care of today and you don’t have to plan or do anything, you don’t even have to ask me to do x, y or z, because they’re already taken care of – you can do whatever you want,” will probably suffice.
There are moms that may be looking for more, those that expect a gift, or those that are hoping for a nice meal in a restaurant, maybe breakfast in bed. But I promise, if you take the planning away for a day, and let her have a day…just one…where she isn’t first in line for all the family decisions, planning and execution, she’ll be very appreciative.
This Mother’s Day? I’m going to the Imagination Movers concert in the evening with my husband and the kids, something I scheduled months ago. Irony. (But I’m still looking forward to it.)